Eulogy: Luvv Letter To Mom

From Memorial Mass
July 18, 2015

Dear Beautiful Mom,

We’re gathered here as family, companions and friends, to celebrate your wonderful life, done YOUR way, and to express our luvv and joy. I had no idea how deeply I would be hit with your passing — my cells feel different. My thoughts are different, my feelings are new.

It has been such a privilege to be part of your life; Bernie’s Journey. And in your 93 years, you have really packed a punch! To walk and dance this life with you has been a real honor, and now in Death, I’m sure you’ll have more to show and tell for all of us who are willing to listen and learn.

Your wonderful life has been a showcase of your proud Irish heritage, your deep Catholic faith, and the essence of Bernie: determined, wise, feisty, resourceful, courageous, thoughtful, generous and oh so lucky! You even planned this day when Susanville is already celebrating! In Bernie’s honor—this will be Bernie’s parade from now on!

About a week before you passed, you asked me, “Why are so many people luvving me? What is it about me?” And you were genuinely curious, and grateful and humbled by the magic in your life, the people who have stepped forward and brought an ease to you during this really tough time. Connie was willing to come and do house calls for your medical needs. Thank you, Connie! And LaNina came on a regular basis, not just as a care giver but as a loyal friend and such a gem to the whole family. We are so grateful. And the deep companionship of your lifeline was your bridge group; many of you are here today. Your bridge friends kept you sharp, happy and competitive, and that was important! Continue reading

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The Mend

The Heart is an amazing instrument and these guys used it to follow their journey.

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Tesla Singing demo

Check this out. Appreciate the post from welcome Clothing

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An Epic Night

Epic Night

I must admit that it didn’t hit me until today, after being in McDonalds and texting my siblings, on how epic my 60th birthday surprise party was. Why was it Epic? To me it was epic because of the bounty of personalities and people that make up the kaleidoscope called my life. The richness of these connections not only represents who and what I am, but also why I am. My life is one that has always been about the people in it. It’s the gold exchange of the companionship that makes me a very wealthy man.

Webster defines Epic as – extending beyond the usual or ordinary especially in size or scope.

I must acknowledge that all the people in my life meet these criteria and then some. When something takes 48 hours to hit me, as this has, that is when I realize just how powerful and majestic the evening was. For a moment I got caught up in the lack of quality of my prime rib, but as I look back, it wasn’t about the food at all. I am truly glad that the Ravioli, Couscous Chicken, Drinks and Cake matched the moment, but it truly did not matter.

There is an ease that has come into my life since my dad’s passing and it is not lost on me that he passed on the first day of my astrological birthday (Virgo). He and Henry – the two people that John eloquently toasted before I got roasted – have been present with me during the entire period of my birth month. It has been a powerful, yet very quiet month for me. I have many, many thoughts and this is actually one of the few times that I have found that I can fully express them.

As I reflect on this Epic evening I can’t ever remember the marina being so peaceful and ethereal. As I refresh my memory and remember the luvv that was present I was eating and drinking from the fountain of companionship, where the exchange far exceeded a prime rib dinner. It is clear to me that on this Epic Night my nutrition was luvv.

Gail and her band of merry individuals (Nora, Debra, John, Leslie, Pharoah, Lisa, Eric & Candice) really put all their luvv into making this moment one that I will have with me for the rest of this life time and if there is reincarnation, the next. Gail has worked for 28 years to try and surprise me and I am very happy that it happened. She was so happy, and I was happy for her.

My brother Eliot (I actually gave him that name) was one of my highlights of the night. He made the truth so funny that I was rolling on the ground emotionally. As my sister Sylvia said – he’s funnier than Kevin Hart and better looking.

John was an awesome MC and spoke of why we have been on this ride together for 13 years and counting. We fight, disagree and shake our heads, but continue to go down this journey together.


Many you have asked me about China. Why China? What do I want to do there, etc, etc? My answer (and this should be of no surprise to those of you that know me) is “I don’t know”. One of the last conversations I had with Henry – he was more intuitive than me – was that it might be in the cards for me to visit China. Add the funny fact that my dad – and he did this every time we got together – would always add another tribe we originated from; his last one added China to the mix. There is probably a plethora or reasons for me to journey to China. I recall Stephen Marbury – who is continuing his professional basketball career in China – saying that when he arrived in China, he stated he immediately realized he was home.

“It’s just something about the serenity and peace of the country,” he said. “I can’t really explain it; you’ve got to experience it.”

There is a part of me that feels that I lived a lifetime in China. Maybe or maybe not, but it’s time for me to go find out. I feel there is something that will complete me over there.

Epic nights and Epic moments are to be cherished and held in the heart for lifetimes. The luvv you have demonstrated to me is something I wish for all of you in return. My wish, as I struggled to blow out the candles, was a simple one. I wished for happiness for all, joy and abundance and most of all Peace.

My dad’s death and the death of others around me got me to realize that our society spends an inordinate amount of time wishing that once someone dies, that they Rest In Peace. I’ve come to realize that it is time to Live In Peace. So from now on, I wish you L.I.P and if you can L.I.P than surely you will always be at rest.

It was Epic night for many Epic individuals and I realized today that while having a video of the night would have been great, all I have to do is reach into my heart and play those precious moments all over again.

Luvv you

Enjoy my video of Appreciation

An Epic Night from bballbusters on Vimeo.

Epic Night additional video

An Epic Night #3 from bballbusters on Vimeo.

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Learning To Be A Hero

It’s been a while since I have posted something on the site. I am getting ready to face a huge hurdle next week, which is dealing with family. Family is a funny word because for me the word excludes the importance of the personal connection and learning that is required. For me there have always been many assumptions in my family.

As I embark on this journey to be with my family I was looking for some inspiration or courage and I found it in these words by Henry Conyers…

The Hero is the principle willing to exemplify in the face of great criticism, rejection and terror.

My job is to go be my own Hero.

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Sophie Tucker On Staying Young

She says it all right here.

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Michael Jackson

I was at Disneyland today and saw Captain EO for the 15th time. I am always left with mesmerizing feelings no matter how many times I see the film. There was an innocence about Michael during a period in his life that not many have reached. I found this piece on Youtube today, it’s a Stevie Wonder Cover, and Stevie did a great job on the original, but Michel took it too another level.

Captain EO Transformational music

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BIGGEST TEAHUPOO EVER from UnFuzzy on Vimeo.

This day at Teahupoo- Aug 27th 2011 during the Billabong Pro waiting period is what many are calling the biggest and gnarliest Teahupoo ever ridden. Chris Bryan was fortunate enough to be there working for Billabong on a day that will go down in the history of big wave surfing. The French Navy labeled this day a double code red prohibiting and threatening to arrest anyone that entered the water.
Kelly Slater described the day by saying “witnessing this was a draining feeling being terrified for other people’s lives all day long, it’s life or death. Letting go of that rope one time can change your life and not many people will ever experience that in their life.”
All images where shot by Chris Bryan using the Phantom HD Gold camera. To see more of Chris’ work check out his website. WWW.CHRISBRYANFILMS.COM
Music: Lower Your Eyelids to Die with the Sun’ by M83.
by Chris Bryan

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If You Build The Luvv All Will Be Well

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Don’t Want To Miss A Thing

As 2013 Get’s on the way. I constantly remind myself that I want to show up and be present.

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